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Spend time cultivating relationships

Sunday, March 25, 2018

In any relationship, whether long or short term, one best way to cultivate the relationship is through communication. A relationship is like a plant. In the budding stage, you have to give plenty of attention until it gets to a stage where the roots have anchored themselves into the soil. Then one’s attention turns to making sure the plant keeps healthy and is watered and the branches trimmed. The difference between the plant and the human relationship is that for long-term relationships to last, each partner has to keep the attention and spark of the earlier times going.

Date night is one of the activities that will keep the spark going in a relationship when there are children. Just the two of you going out on a date, whether it is dinner or a movie or a show. My philosophy in life is that Christmas, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day should be celebrated every day in a household. By celebrating these special occasions every day it helps in keeping the communication energy flowing.

We have to constantly keep reminding ourselves that despite our busy and demanding lives, we have to make a great effort to do something nice for our partner. The phrase–Life gets in the way–is becoming an excuse and should not be acceptable to us any longer. We need to avoid regret and the blame game which can be quite intriguing and painful.

Relationships should be seen as a partnership and not one person doing everything. If a partner is retired and the other working, then the partner who is retired should organize meals, look after the kids, and put away the laundry while watching cricket or football matches. The working partner could do the laundry, tidy up, ensure that the bills get paid as most utilities can be paid online, and do the groceries.

Someone comes every other week to do the heavy cleaning. At least this is how it is in my household.

Spending time with the kids doing activities eg, taking them to the grocery. Get them into the habit of buying food for the house. Dealing with the cashier, packing and unpacking of the groceries. Take time with the kids and their homework, there is an online Maths course for kids which has been developed by Kyle Andrews from Tobago so that a parent can learn with their kids doing the course. There are lots of other websites that teach different subjects so this is a great way for parents to learn with their kids.

Another activity that will be a strong bond for couples and family is starting a vegetable garden so that you teach your kids how to feed themselves. This fosters great communication and opportunity to connect/ground with the earth.

These activities are natural and rewarding and helps to sustain great relationships.


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